mommy101 asked:
My husband belives that the three boy’s we have should not have to do chores such as dishes, laundry, vaccuming, or clean dinner dishes while I and or he watches Tv and or orther things. he belives that becasue I am femail and a stay at home wife and Stepmom that I should have to do all the work. what do you think please help me in this matter. he don’t even want them to collect the durty laundy or put clean away.
Oh ya I have a dad and a dog living in a four bedroom home only female. for a total of 6 people and a large indoor dog. boy’s are two teenagers and one ten years old
Megan
My husband belives that the three boy’s we have should not have to do chores such as dishes, laundry, vaccuming, or clean dinner dishes while I and or he watches Tv and or orther things. he belives that becasue I am femail and a stay at home wife and Stepmom that I should have to do all the work. what do you think please help me in this matter. he don’t even want them to collect the durty laundy or put clean away.
Oh ya I have a dad and a dog living in a four bedroom home only female. for a total of 6 people and a large indoor dog. boy’s are two teenagers and one ten years old
Megan
November 26th, 2009 at 9:31 pm
Amelia
best way is not to have sex with him
November 29th, 2009 at 12:38 am
Leah
Cleaning the house is your job, since you have no form of income. Stop trying to pawn off work on your kids. Your husband is teaching your kids a good lesson in that if you alone bring home enough money to support a family you get to be king of your castle.
December 2nd, 2009 at 7:14 am
Brooklyn
What a thug. Make your husband do it. Better yet, go on strike, leave it lay and let it accumulate. That ought to get him off his butt and perhaps he will change his mind about it.
Try buying a book on raising children to be responsible adults. What you are requesting from these kids will help them in the future. Maybe if he realized it’s not about who does what but about teaching them to be responsible, he will change his point of view.
But I doubt it.
Didn’t you have any indication of what a sexist pig you were about to marry before you married him?
December 3rd, 2009 at 7:14 pm
Emily
Sounds like he wants them to be just as ‘male chauvinistic’ as he is! Why do all the work when you have a slave to do it for you………………………….
Anyway, tell him to get off his butt and do chores too!!!
Helping around the house is NOT going to make a ’sissy’ out of any male!!!!! Besides, he makes the mess – he can clean it up!
December 6th, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Adrian
I’d put my foot down. The children will never learn responsibility if they can’t even pick up after themselves. Your husband should pick up after himself too. He shouldn’t be a slob and then tell you it’s your job. Sounds like they take advantage of you and take you for granted. Maybe Mom needs a vacation by herself and leave them to fend for themselves for a while:)
December 8th, 2009 at 3:54 am
James
You really need to fight back on this matter. If you let your husband and his kids to walk over you like that, they’ll never stop and you’ll completely lose their respect for you.
As a stay at home wife/stepmom, it is your duty to up-keep the house while everyone is away. as you are not contributing an income. However when everyone is home, the housework is supposed to be divided equally. You are not their slave and as a woman you need to stand up for yourself!
December 8th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
Savannah
I say what a pig!!!
Who does he think he is,you can’t change him but you can stop your children from becoming him.You are the parent and your children should be helping you and you should enforce this,do you want your boys to grow up like him?
December 10th, 2009 at 2:34 pm
Brian
Myself I would either not do the work so they can realize what you do (worked for me) or just start telling everyone what they are going to do whether they like it or not. I’m a SAHM and while yes I do keep the house clean and my 2 boys do help me when hubby gets home he has his own set of chores that he is in charge of. He has his moments where he wants to be waited on hand and foot and I just ignore him or tell him to do it himself because I’m not his or my boys slave.
December 12th, 2009 at 3:01 am
Jasmine
Household chores is the responsibility of EVERYONE.
Doing chores requires team work. No one sits watching TV for example while others work.
As a family you work together and this does not matter what the chores are. No one is a slave.
Remember these words. Work together, play together, stay together.
December 13th, 2009 at 12:14 pm
Timothy
im the oldest sis and the only grl besides mom and my dad expects me to help my mom do everything while he watches tv and my bros. play outside. they are still pretty young so i try conditioning them by saying take out the trash every other day or make your bed every morn. and just simply place your dirty clothes where they belong after you take them off instead of leaving them on the floor. now they are just accustomed to it so they do it w/out asking. i started a couple yrs ago. there is no hope for my father he is used to being looked after. i dont know if it will work on teenagers since they are used to not doin anything.
December 14th, 2009 at 3:00 pm
Jayden
Going on strike, withholding sex, etc. will not solve the underlying problem: his belief that he can take advantage of you, and the lesson he is teaching his children by doing so. Everyone lives in the house, everyone contributes to the daily upkeep of the house. Laundry, etc. are important skills to know, for the day will come when those children leave the house and what then? They don’t do their own part, their roommates will have some mighty negative things to say, for starters. Positive reinforcement is key. Thank you for picking the wet towels off the floor, you’ve saved me a lot of time today. Thank you for scraping your plate, now the dishwasher won’t get clogged with leftover food. Thank you for taking out the trash, now bugs won’t think our house is an appropriate place to live. Tell the boys that you’ll do the laundry, if and only if their clothes are in their hampers. It’s not extra work for them to put dirty clothes in a basket instead of on the floor/over a chair/on the bed/in their desk drawer. When they, inevitably, complain about not having any clean underwear, remind them that their hampers were empty, and you took that to mean they didn’t have anything they wanted you to wash.
December 17th, 2009 at 11:23 am
Riley
I would come up with a chore list..for the boys and when hubby objects which you know he will then tell him fine.. what ever chores you don’t want them to do the he dose them or they don’t get done. Kids need to learn how to take care of themselves at some point and in this day and age the chances of those boys finding a wife that will put up with them expecting a slave are slim to none. If all else fails get a part time job and tell them you work so they help clean…
December 20th, 2009 at 11:32 am
Chase
The kids should be helping out – and at their ages, actually quite a lot. Everyone in the family should be doing things to help out around the house, and it shouldn’t be tied to an allowance. And this is all aside from keeping their own rooms clean.